Balancing Act

Accounting 101 anyone? was going to be the title of this post.

Ever since the reorganisation at the office and me leaving soon, I only have 3 staffs under me, yes you read it right, 3, t-h-r-e-e, tiga, rendek, tres..., anyways, with just 3 staffs, year end closing and the horse event coming up, I have to do a lot of things on my own. One of the thing is to prepare the account for the ASSociation. The last 3 days were spent doing the accounts from scratch, manually!, thus, the reason why there was no entry yesterday despite it being a Tuesday (like, who cares again?).

It was an experience, no less. I forgot how it felt (exhilarating, in fact) trying to assign what code to which transaction and in the end trying to balance all things up. When all things added up beautifully and balanced out nicely, oh boy!!! What a feeling, what a great feeling.

Which brings me to another issue on hand. I was filling an application form for a job up north and stop short at the question, WHAT MOTIVATES YOU. I was at a total lost... How can I not know what motivates me... maybe because I have not felt motivated for a long long time. I have been thinking about this for days now.

And then today we received news that the mother of a friend, passed away, Al Fatihah.

So how did the first bring me to the second and the third brings me back to the first. Confused much? Well, me too. This is all Allah's work. Things don't just happen, they happen for a reason.

1. I really want that job, its the kind of job I have been dreaming of.
2. The answer to the question WHAT MOTIVATES YOU will determine whether or not the application will be considered, that's why I want to be very careful with my answer.
3. I have to keep reminding myself why I want to move back home, I know why I am leaving my job, but why balik kampung, well that news we received today is crystal clear, if you catch my drift.

Because when I was doing all the numbers, I get excited like a kid at Christmas, I remember now what motivates me. Numbers, yes them numbers. I like playing with them. Solve problems with them. Forecast the future with them. Apply them. I can now answer that question truthfully. Now all I have to think about is what demotivates me, I know the answer to this, but I need to put them into words. I may need my sister's assistance on this. I really want a chance to be considered. Rezeki di tangan Allah, so as long as I have put in my best effort, all I have to do is doa and tawakal and leave everything to Allah swt.

Its midnight.. and I am sleepy. Reading back what I wrote, I realised I was not coherent, but who cares, its my blog, I can write whatever I want.

I still have one question though before I lay down by Abang Ayis side (please sing this to Kool and the gang's Cherish.. what am I meraban-ing ni?); okay that one question. How come its all quiet about what and why is the 15 year old doing driving a car at 2 in the morning?