The last time I spoke to him was the morning the SPM result was out. He was all dressed up in school uniform at 8am and he stood outside my room. I asked him where he was going at he said in his usual loud voice "nak pi sekolah la, keputusan keluaq hari ni"... I joked that only potential scorers will be as eager as he was, it was too early to go to school, they were only going to release the result after 10am. He then asked what the date was that day and when I said 23rd March, he said "betoi la hari ni keluaq keputusan" and he left. Half and hour or so later he came back saying that they will only announced the result after 11am. As usual I said, I told you so. I offered him a ride to school but he refused, preferring to go with friends instead. I did not wait for him to return as Mak and I left for KL at 12 noon that day. That was the last time I saw Ismail alive.
When Mak returned from KL, Ismail had a fever but he was still working that day. He was delivering ice cubes for RM25 a day. Ismail was asleep when Mak saw that his leg had become inflamed. He was complaining that his leg hurts but we took no notice because he was still playing ping pong every night and working every day. He told me a few days before I left for KL that he felt like his bone is loose, his exact words were "Maknjang, Me'e rasa macam tulang Me'e dah kendoq" while pointing to his left leg. When he was in Form 2, he had a broken bone there due to an accident on the way to school, a girl riding a motorbike hit his bicycle. A couple of weeks before that day, he met with an accident at Kepala Batas, with the next door neighbour. The motorbike Ismail rode broke to pieces, the car the neighbour drow was badly dented. Ismail had minor scratches only because he fell on the car. Later he complaint of chest pain, so Mak and Azwan took him to the hospital, after x-ray and all, they found nothing wrong. He never complaint about his left leg until that afternoon. It did not strike my brain to connect his complaint with the accidents he had had.
When Mak saw his leg, Mak and Azwan took him to the hospital, he was warded. He had a slight fever. His half sister was on duty at the hospital that day, Mak and Azwan left. He is a big boy and he only had a slight fever and the doctor said, they were going to open up the area and cleaned it up. Nothing to worry about. That was on Tuesday night. On Wednesday, his temperature risen, the procedure was postponed. Nobody visited Ismail because he had a handphone with him, if anything was wrong, he can always call home. Thursday morning, his temperature soared to 47 degreee and that's when everybody took notice. His mother went to visit and he complaint that he was in pain. His whole body was painful, he said. The whole family, almost everyone who always hang around our bangsal ping pong and neighbours went to visit him that day and stayed on. Later that day, when he cannot stand the heat anymore, he went to take a shower. He collapsed upon reaching his bed and was moved to another ward. His heart stopped beating at about 12 midnight. They resuscitated him and moved him to the ICU. I went home on Friday morning.
I went to the hospital after making my rounds picking Njang, Kak Ta and my nephew and nieces. I knew when I saw him lying helpless on the ICU bed that we have lost him. The fact that they allowed anyone to visit him in without limiting the number of visitors was already a sign. I was asked later to make a decision whether or not to resuscitate him again when his heart stopped. They never said IF, they straight away say WHEN and then you know for certain. After consulting my parents and my siblings, we decided DNR. It broke my heart to have to be the one telling the doctor of our decision.
The bacteria from his untreated wound had poisoned his blood causing organ failures. Despite injecting him with numerous antibiotics and what nots, the bacteria has spread beyond help. The cause of death was septicemia.
Until today we still cannot believed what had happened. Everyday we mentioned his name. Every little thing we do will have something to remind us of him. Having meals, if Ismail is around, no food will be wasted. While driving, if Ismail is in the car, I have to check the tyres.. he is very heavy, you see. When my head itched.. Ismail will always cabut my uban. Sometimes I felt like he is just sleeping in the middle room. Sometimes when I heard a motorbike approaching, I'd imagined its him, returning from work... Oh Ismail, our bangla, our al-karu.. we missed you so much. ...
